Because sandwiches are important

As I headed to work today I looked at the other passengers on the tube train, wondering if any one of these people would like an adventure. I know you're not supposed to judge people by appearances, but I forgot to pick up a Metro. I was bored.

I wondered, 'Would she like an adventure?' 'Would he?' For every single one of these fellow passengers my guess was a decisive 'No'.

I imagined them answering my 'Do you want an adventure?' question with, 'Nah, I'm busy', or 'Life's complicated enough' or 'My job's a challenge, leave me alone', or 'I don't have the time', or 'that would be silly', or 'Adventure? I doubt it... and what do you mean by adventure anyway?'

No wonder I wasn't getting any IWAA mail. Rather than getting down about this, I decided that those who wanted adventure were a special breed, an exclusive club. At the moment I'm in an exclusive club of one. I'm really very special!

Well I had to think that, or else I'd just give up and cry.

Something's been stuck in my head for the last few days, a new McDonald's TV ad ending with the statement, 'Because sandwiches are important.'

When I heard the guy enjoying McDonalds sandwich say this, I couldn't quite believe it. 'Because sandwiches are important?'

Was this serious?

Maybe it was supposed to be ironic? In which case, well done McDonalds, because I found this statement highly amusing.

A new 'Subway' shop has just opened round the corner from our office. I've never tried a Subway sandwich before. In honour of the McDonalds ad, and because it was likely to be the closest to adventure I'd get today, I decided to try a Subway sandwich for my lunch. Just for a change.

I don't know why I didn't think of trying something from the new McDonalds toasted deli range? Actually I do, I'd had one once before.

In actual fact I forgot about my Subway sandwich resolution and went to Starbucks in my lunch hour. At Starbucks I can sit down with my laptop and write this blog. Plus I like their mochas. No cream, thank you.

I had a sandwich too. Only I don't think that's important.

I don't think sandwiches are important at all. Do you really think I regret missing that Subway eating debut? Sandwiches are just a lunch, and an unimaginitive one at that. I wouldn't stop to think if McDonald's hyped it's sandwiches as delicious, or unique, or special in any way. But that word 'important' rankles.

I know big businesses use advertising bullshit all the time, and like most people I feel immune to it's ridiculousness. I don't care when companies spend millions claiming their products will change your life. These claims are plainly untrue; and I'm used to their harmless lies. But 'important'? A sandwich? This was taking the bullshit too far!

Important should mean love or hate, happiness, sadness, life or death, passion of some sort... If McDonalds claimed any or all of these things for it's snack then I wouldn't object. But they don't, they claim a sandwich is important. As if this dull snack is enough, is an end in itself.

I admit a sandwich is a convenient and simple way to satisfy a basic need.

So sandwiches are important? Sure. Because what's important is the simple satisfaction of our basic needs...

This McDonald's ad tells us what matters is apathy and no imagination.

I don't care if companies spend millions telling me oven chips will drive me crazy with joy, or that some shampoo will make me fantastic in bed; but please don't spend fortunes convincing me that all there is to life is something with nothing very special going for it. I really don't want to buy that.

The glorifying of this easy lunchtime fuel suggests a five minute munch is the best way to make the world a better place. What's the meaning of life? Sandwiches!

No. No way. What's the meaning of life? I don't know. So what's important? I know what I think. I know what I want. And it's not a fucking sandwich.

Enjoy your lunch.